honor

Everyone's practice begins somewhere different. 

The first time I did yoga was in high school when my aerobics teacher decided that every Friday we would go into the smelly wrestling room to do sun salutation and meditate. For most kids, this was a free pass to sleep. For me, it was a struggle. At the time I was a sprinter on the track team and I felt I had too much energy to lie on the floor for 30 minutes. After I graduated, I dropped yoga and never looked back. 

Flash forward a few years later, I decided to make an appointment with my doctor. I had been feeling anxious, annoyed, sad, and alone. I sat in tears as he told me that anxiety and depression were a chemical imbalance and that I shouldn't feel guilty for this. He recommended a few different things; therapy, medication and  surprisingly, yoga. He promised me that the benefits could possibly rid me of anxiety and depression. I laughed at the idea--yoga had done nothing for me in the past. However, I was desperate and decided to give it a try. 

My sister was nice enough to go to my first class with me--a hot yoga class. I won't romanticize my experience. I struggled, I sweat, and I almost cried. But when we went into the final savasana, something the yoga instructor told us would become my mantra for the next few months. She whispered, "You can do hard things. You have proven that to yourself today. You are stronger than you ever imagined. Honor yourself." I left class that day sweaty, tired and rejuvenated. From that day on, I promised myself that I would honor my heart, my soul, and my body. 

When it comes down to it, we all deserve happiness. We deserve love and we deserve peace. Practicing yoga will heal your mentality if you allow it, and it will tell you what it told me: you deserve to be honored. 

"Yoga teaches us to cure what need not be endured and endure what cannot be cured." --BKS Iyengar 

Am I Kanye West yet?

Lately I've been a little distant. I've been enjoying the two weeks off I have before I start school yet again. And lately, I've been feeling pretty crappy about NOT graduating yet, or not being close to graduating like so many of my friends. And boy have I been reminded by so many that I'm not as close as them to graduating. People have been feeling the need to give me school advice that I didn't want or need. 

So I've been feeling a little lost, and quite frankly a little hurt. What am I supposed to do? What do I want to do? What do I want to become? 

But why are we in such a rush to become? There's nothing natural about four years of grueling school. And to be honest, a full load of school wasn't helping me any. It was destroying me. It brought stress and anxiety and a whole lot of tears to the point where I wasn't enjoying my life like I should be. I sat in my room for days typing essays, drinking energy drinks. The only time I would see the sun was when I was walking between the buildings at campus. Is that really any way to live? 

I decided it wasn't. I took a semester off. I lowered my class load. And quite frankly I've never been happier. I'm learning so much about myself. I've gained a green thumb, I've mastered the art of DIY. I even actually appreciated my math class this semester. I'm enjoying challenging things. So yes, I won't be graduating within the four years it should take. But I don't regret it, and I won't let anyone belittle me or tell me what I should and should not be doing. 

So this blog post is for the people who have told me that I need to take more classes, that I need to stop taking breaks, or reminding me every five minutes that they only have so many more classes to take: I don't care, thank you very much. 

Also, this post isn't meant to be mean to the people who are graduating. You should be so freaking proud. You worked HARD. Good for you. 

northbound

I'm back at it again. 

Why? Because I'm discovering happiness, and I've spent a lot of time focusing and learning about what makes me genuinely happy. And there are a few things! Like gardening, drinking a coke, doing laundry. But one big thing I've noticed is that I'm not happy if I'm not creating or cultivating some type of thing. So I'm back at creating, at growing, at learning. 

www.etsy.com/shop/northboundcandles/

flowerspiration

just a little late night Pinterest action. hashtag flower power? it's spring and I love it. 

my happy place;

Today I'm showing you my happy place.
aka my favorite parts of my home. I strongly believe that you need to have some places in your house that just make you happy--whether the dishes are done, whether the laundry is done, or you are just having a crappy day.

My walls are not actually this yellow, I promise. It's the shadows. But we painted the walls yellow (which I'm sure some of you are just shuddering with disgust) because yellow is bright. It is happy. And we have the biggest windows that let in light, so we wanted to play off of that.

My favorite picture on our wall. Short story time: So I was wrapping a present for my mother-in-law. I found this random paper from a cupboard in my house and wrapped it. Then my mom kind of freaked out because it was my grandma's, but we gave it to her anyway. She knew that it was my grandma's paper so she saved it and framed it for me. So now I have my three favorite ladies all in one frame. Love love love.

My bathroom is DEFINITELY one of my favorite spots in our home. We spent sooo much time on this bathroom. It took us a year, because we had a year to waste and we are both procrastinators. I think we got it done a few days before I actually moved in. We tore out the old vanity, painted the walls and got new trim. I love the color and the lighting and my small vanity.

I really like my shower curtain and this little shelf thing above my toilet. Also candles. CANDLES ARE HAPPINESS. I believe it. And I believe that you gotta have a bathroom that's relaxing. Bath bombs are made for a reason.

My mirror and the lights are my faaaavorite. We got the mirror from Home Depot. We made that little shelf where all of our things are sitting.

Can you tell I like colors yet?

So. We are in a town home and although we own the town home, we didn't want to paint all of the walls a crazy color, because it's harder to sell that way. So I was forced to have tan walls. Which makes for some fun coloring and lots of pictures.

This was a DIY project with my sister-in-law. Don't look super close otherwise you'll see all of my mistakes. But we found this at Walmart for like $3?!

My favorite wall. I just like pictures.

My brother-in-law (is that what you call a sister-in-laws husband?) gave me this for Christmas! Oh, chalkboard. I love you.

I have a BRIGHT yellow door. Do you hate me yet? BUT I have a theory. Like you can have friends over and you don't have to do the dishes or sweep the floor. Their eyes are going to be in a trance the whole time. You are covered. Yellow doors are like a safety net.

My favorite wall. It's a little crazy, but I love it. ALSO, DANI: your grandma gave me that frying pan clock for my ward shower. Don't you love it?!

So I have a blue fireplace. I'm not really sure why. Like I said, tan walls call for crazy colors.

P.S. I'm not showing you my kitchen because I don't feel like doing dishes. xoxo.

makeup of the day?

Is this a new thing? Yes. Will it be a consistent thing? I don't know, I just liked my makeup today. I'm no professional, so maybe don't take tips from me. But if you're like woah, I like her makeup--here are the products I used and the order in which I did them.

First things first, primer. I used wet n' wild. If you don't have primer, it's okay. 

Second, foundation. I haven't found a cruelty free brand that I've liked yet, so I used the one that I had in my makeup bag (that I stole from my mom): L'Oreal Visible Lift. What? I'm only twenty one. I know, but I like it. It's creamy and matches my skin so whatever. I also add BB cream. My favorite is the Maybelline Dream Fresh. Again, not all of these are cruelty free. I'm in the process. 

Third: concealer for those dark circles. I used wet n' wild's Come Correct because Fergie. 

Fourth: bronzer. My favorite is the e.l.f. golden bronzer. I use the dark brown for right under my cheek bone and the light pink for my cheeks. Also, I use the dark on the sides of my nose and the hairline on my forehead. It's like fake contouring with bronzer. It works for me, and it's a lot cheaper.

Fifth: eyebrows. Okay. Eyebrows are personal. If you have a way that works for you, stick to it! I use a mixture of my mom's old gray eyeliner and NYX eyebrow pencil. Fill them in. The beginning of your eyebrows should be a little lighter. And then--tip: outline your eyebrows in concealer and blend to your skin. TRUST ME. It fades all your hard edges. And then, just so my eyebrows don't look tattooed, I use a brush to mess them up a little.  

Sixth: now for your lids! I used Too Faced Boudoir Eyes. Satin Sheets for the lids, Voulez-Vous for the crease and In The Buff for the brow bone. Blend together. And then I coated everything softly in Birthday Suit. You guys, I'm laughing at the names but gosh they are the prettiest colors. 

Seventh: winged liner and mascara. Just try to get them centered haha. I use and LOVE the NYX super skinny marker. But if you don't care about cruelty, I would suggest the Maybelline Master Precise by Eye Studio. It has more pigment. Then for mascara I use NYX's Doll Eye in volume. It is amaaaazing. 

8th: lips. ALWAYS line your lips. Your lips will look more defined. Also Kylie Jenner. Just saying. I used a really old pink liner and then Sephora's lipstick which had no name or number so... 

Also, here's a link to the brushes I use. Cruelty free and they're on sale and Walgreens right now. 

Lovely Looks

Eye Brush Set

water.color

Soooo on Pinterest tonight I'm just falling in love with these tattoos. I even have a board dedicated to tattoos because I seriously love them, though they will never have the chance to grace my body. I'd like to think that my alter ego is covered in tattoos and has blue hair because sometimes that's who I want to be. 

*all photos are from Pinterest.* 

Seriously. Dead. 

Clearly I love watercolor. 

Crying. 

Yes please.